Friday, December 23, 2011

"How deep the Father's LOVE for me..."

Christmas, end of year ,beginning a new year....it makes me reflective....
I was thinking of the good news, the glad tidings ,what the earth gained but at what cost to heaven.
I ws thinking of my daughter.
I was thinking of the song "How deep the Father's love for me".
I'll start with the story of my daughter. Several years ago one of our young daughters had some extremely bad dental problems. It brought about a trip to the Children's hospital in Denver.
She was a very, very, shy child and it worried me greatly as to how this was all going to affect her. I stressed over and over again to the drs. and nurses that I had to be with her at ALL times. As that was impossible ,of course, for surgery they allowed me to hold her until she went under and assured me I would be called before she woke up. She clung to me as I told her she would take a nap and I would be right beside her when she awoke. Then she went limp in my arms.
We waited what seemed waaaayy too long and then they urgently called me to recovery. As I walked through the door, I heard a child's frantic, ragged ,screams of terror, "mommy, mommy, mommy mommy!".
It is hard to describe my feelings as I knew that voice to be my daughters and I RAN to her side!!! She was sitting up in bed ,wild-eyed (very much awake!) and reaching for me!
The she sobbed, "mommy you weren't here!"
I was angry, very angry at what they had done to her. I hurt; a deep, searing hurt for my daughter and for the fact that she saw me as having lied to her.
The only comfort I could find was holding, squeezing her, and murmuring over and over "mommy's here, mommy's here. you're okay."
"My God,My God why hast thou forsaken me! "
"The Father turns His face away..."
How could a father do that!!!
Do you understand what that meant for the Father?
Do you understand that mankind's joy at the birth of a baby brought such pain to heaven?
I'm reminded again of an old song that impressed when I first heard it as a child, "His birth was but a path to Calvary".
The Father knew that.
The angels sang "Good tidings" and HE sent them to say that because the love the Father felt for the lost children of mankind over- rode what he knew was the cost to Him and His Son.
"How deep the Father's love for us."
How long has it been since you really contemplated the "Glorious Wondrousness" behind the Joy of this time we celebrate as Christmas!?

Sunday, September 11, 2011

Just thinking...

I've been thinking about posting more often again on here. I kept a xanga very faithfully for a few years but xanga's site just has so many offensive things popping up, that I have grown weary of it.
It seems I never really take time for blog posts any more and I miss it. sometimes there are things that just cannot be said quite the same verbally as they can with writing them out. I suppose somehow it's because when we write we take the time to be sure we are saying what we really feel and/or mean instead of just blurting out the first thing that comes to mind.
But... that very thing is kinda my dilemma now.... I want to write but I really am full of too many conflicting emotions to know how to express myself.
My oldest "little" girl is getting married in 8 days....how am I supposed to feel?
If I was really good with words or the computer I would post a big long post with lots of pictures of her throughout life and lots of all the right words....but...... I really don't even know where to begin.
Mostly, you just wonder have you been the sort of Mom she really needed? Have you taught her all she needed to know? Did she really truly "get it" that nothing really matters except God?
And.... you look forward to the happiness of sharing housekeeping and "wife-ly" tips with her and you look forward to holding her little babies and you look forward to a new son and....
.......you look forward...... to the unknown future in the hands of a known Guide!

Friday, February 18, 2011

Nailing Jesus to The Cross

 I found this in my xanga blog archives and it touched me again.....

It was an ordinary day, with ordinary duties and conversation.Then out of the mouth of the 4 yr old it came, "Mom, if I tell a lie, is that just like nailing Jesus to the cross again?" His little voice was very serious.
I stopped... Now that is a good question! In trying to understand where the question came from, it became apparent he had overheard conversation on Heb. 4:6 "...seeing they crucify to themselves the Son of God afresh, and put Him to an open shame." and Heb.10:29..."who hath trodden underfoot the Son of God and hath counted the blood of the covenant wherewith he was sanctified, an unholy thing..."
As I attempted to put into 4 yr old language the concept of those verses, suddenly the day was no longer ordinary. What an awesome concept and leave it to a little child to see it in its simplicity. How often have I stopped to really put that into perspective against my sin?
What could I say? Yes, really it is that simple. We, as adults try to distance ourselves from these verses by saying that means the hardened,unrepentant sinner. Why not make it more personal? When I sin, I may as well be nailing my Saviour to the cross again. He bore my sin once and for all to grant me forgiveness and freedom from sin. Why do act as if that wasn't sufficient? Why do I shame Him by treating that great sacrifice of so little consequence that I can't even get victory over those same pesky "little " things that cloud my life over and over?
It was a gem of truth in an otherwise ordinary day. There are so, many, many reasons Jesus said " ye must become as little children". Thank You, my son, thank you, my Father!